Monday, July 28, 2008
Ever Met this Person?
Ever met this person? He or she is forever eating junk, yet claiming it's healthy.
Pack of Fruit Licorice: "It's made with real 100% real fruit!* And it's fat free!"
Taco Salad (including a greasy shell and a pound of cheese): "I eat light. I'm having a salad."
Battered Fried Chicken: "Chicken is leaner than beef. I eat healthy."
Croissant, Jumbo Bagel or any Oversized Sandwich Roll: "I'm gettin' my grains."
Baked Potato (with cheese, sour cream, butter, bacon): "I'm gettin' my veggies. And gettin' my calcium from the sour cream)"
Three Slices of Thick Crust Pizza (with pepperoni, peppers and olives): "I'm gettin' my grains with the crust, my calcium with the cheese, my protein with the meat, and my veggies with the peppers. It's a perfect food."
Plate of Nachos: "Another perfect food!"
Large Frozen Yogurt (with Oreo sprinkles and caramel sauce): "I eat healthy snacks"
Starbucks Double Caramel Latte (with whipped cream): "Just a cup of coffee for me!"
This goes along with my theory that anyone who's constantly insisting "I'm doing [this virtuous thing]" is doing the opposite.
*Probably someone puts a few drops of 100% real fruit in the candy vat now and then