Tuesday, September 07, 2010

The Sun: Why Do I Even Bother to Shine?

Guest Blogger: Sol, A.K.A. "The Sun"
I was so eager in the beginning.  I knew developing and maintaining a solar system would take dedication and work, but I was under the delusion that it might, maybe PAY OFF SOME DAY...
I'd considered my planet collection a work in progress.   I pulled the most interesting planets I could find into my orbit.  I kept the moons spinning.   Installed an asteroid belt.  Threw in some comets.  Hung rings on Saturn (still making payments on these).  I thought, this may not be the best planet system, but someday it'll be one of the greats.
Now, after 4 billion  years of being snubbed as a location for intergalactic conventions, absent in "Planetary System of the Week" mentions, and not even a stub on the MilkyWaykipeda, it's become clear.
My planetary system is crap and I have no business running it.  
No double stars.  No pulsars.   Most of my planets are lifeless, and the one holdout is crawling with the most disgusting things you ever saw.
The final straw came when I took the "How will YOU end up" quiz on Facebook.  I'd always figured I'd be fusing iron some day.  And then I'd go supernova.  Then everyone would point to me and say how awesome I was.   Nope.  According to the results I'll eventually fall apart and become a "planetary nebula"  which is the politically correct way to say "space booger".  Left over at the core will be a "degenerate dwarf".  That's like a tatertot that glows in the dark.
Boy, I'm glad I've worked billions of years for this! 


Linda said...

Wonderful piece of writing!
Funny and sad.

Namowal said...

Thanks, Linda,
Part of me thinks the Sun is being whiny... ...but who hasn't worked on a project (or skill) only to realize Oh no! I'm not as good as I thought I was! Reality slaps.

Pile Girl said...

Sometimes I know just how that sun feels...

Namowal said...

You said it, Pile Girl.

That being said, a surefire way to drive yourself (or at least myself) nuts is to compare myself to someone "better" than me in some capacity.
It's trouble, because almost anyone can find someone better (or younger, smarter, richer, more likable, or more successful etc..) than themselves. We (or at least I) can forget that it works the other way too.
(Hope that doesn't sound too preachy or know-it-ally!)