Monday, April 26, 2010
Guest Blogger: Chipper the House Finch
I got mad and said "Why are two mammals bossing around all forty birds in our flock? Let's descend on the feeder like a school of fish. They can't keep us away from the feeder!"
So we swarmed in and the squirrels ran away. Problem solved I thought.
Then a bunch of Mockingbirds started dive bombing a baby squirrel. I said to leave him alone because he'd never bothered us. They said "He's a mammal! Cats, dogs, squirrels, they're all rotten! Bird killers all!"
Then they started pecking his head! I got in between them and they started pecking me and calling me "Traitor" and "Mammel lover."
Then the baby squirrel's mother shows up and says I should be ashamed of myself for starting a riot. I said I didn't want a riot. A big crowd of birds started jeering and pecking me. "Hypocrite!" they said. "Coward! You let a baby mammal scare you away! You can't be in our flock!"
So now I don't have a flock and no animal will speak to me.