Saturday, September 19, 2009
Exclusive: Interview with my Cockatiel, Tosca!
Interviewer: Namowal says you're cranky and prone to biting. Is this true?
Tosca: So a bird can't bite someone once in awhile? What's the big deal?
Interviewer: Why do you bite? Does she scare you?
Tosca: Nah. I only bite her when she makes me mad.
Interviewer: She makes you mad?
Tosca: Oh yes. Mostly it's her hands. They're always trying to pat my head or make me perch on them. Who wants to perch on some stupid hand? So I tell her to quit it, and if she doesn't quit, I'll bite.
Interviewer: You talk to her?
Tosca: Sure. I talk to her in CL. Cockatiel Language. If I step back, flash my eyes and open my beak, that means stop that now or I'll bite. Namowal ignores the warning each time. So I show her some beak.
Interviewer: Namowal once had another cockatiel. Tell me about Quasi.
Tosca: I'm glad he's dead! I never liked him. He was a jerk. An ugly jerk with a jacked up lower bill. Always acting tough with me. And he'd totally kiss up to Namowal. He'd let her pet and cuddle him! It was disgraceful.
Interviewer: Is it true you once peeled a price tag off and glued your mouth shut? That Namowal had to take you to the vet to fix things?
Tosca: I suppose you never did anything stupid when you were young?
Interviewer: You realize that Namowal gives you food and water everyday?
Tosca: Big whup. Like I couldn't find food on my own! It's insulting!
Interviewer: Is there anything positive you can say about Namowal?
Tosca: Well, she plays a musical instrument I really like. Real loud and shrieky- I always sing along. A bagpipe like thing, except the air intake is by an internal fan instead a mouthpiece. She plays it by my cage each day. I think it's called "A Hoover".
Below is the original drawing I uploaded. Something's wrong. It's been fixed in the top picture. Can you spot the difference?