Here's my personal list:
1.The Hamburgler
Someone McDonald's ad man had to be freebasing special sauce to come up this one. A rat nosed runt with a bad tie who says "robble robble". Robble Robble!? What's wrong with him? His shtick is his burger fetish- he steals them. Then Ronald McDonald makes him give them back. Like anyone wants a hamburger after this freak handled it...2. Lady Elaine Fairchilde
Remember her? She was the hag that from Mister Roger's Neighborhood who lived in the Land of Make Believe. Not to be snotty, but since this is the Land of Make Believe, couldn't someone have make believed something less hideous? What's the black stuff on her nose and cheeks? Frostbite? Leprosy? Oh well, her nose is too big anyway...
Click here for another blogger's detailed take on this disturbing character.
3 Anthropomorphic Trees
The Wizard of Oz had them. McDonaldland commercials had them. Bark encrusted giants with gnarled features and twiggy arms. When I was three I didn't care how many McDonald's Hot Apple Pies were on them. They scared the sap out of me. My dad tried to calm me by claiming that the trees were really bunny rabbits dressed up as trees. This too was disturbing. What kind of twisted bunny rabbit dresses up like a tree and scares little kids? I wondered.4. Roy "Mooskateer" Williams
I couldn't figure him out. The original Mickey Mouse Club had singing and dancing kids... and this old guy, Roy. He looked mean. Like a cranky neighbor who'd bark at you when you chased a ball onto his lawn. He claimed Walt Disney put him on the show because he was "fat and funny looking". Fat and scary looking is more like it. I sincerely believe the Mousekateer role call bit was, in fact, a head count to make sure he hadn't bitten off any heads.5. The School House Rock Adjective Slayer
This crude Peppermint Patty knock off had a backpack of adjectives... and murderous streak. "Girls who are tall get taller! Boys who are small, get smaller", she sings, growing tall while a nearby boy shrinks to mouse proportions, "Till one is the tallest, and one is the smallest off all," she adds. Then she steps on him. With forethought and malice, she crushes the kid with her 1970's sandled foot. The animator thoughtfully has the word "STOMP!" pop up in sync with the evil deed in to clarify the boy's fate.
7 comments:
Lady Elaine Fairchilde, I agree she was creepy. Even as a child I didnt like the lnad of make believe. Plus I never have known anyone who changed shoes and jakets when they entered the home.
I always figured Hamburglar to be suspicious. I'd hate to find out what's buried in his back yard. *shudder*
"What's burried in his backyard?" that IS a scarg thought. You know, I havn't seen the policeman character with the big mac head for awhile...
And, of course, Britain had Noseybonk...
Is it just me or does the "hamburgler" look like "Dubya"?
Loved the twisted bunnies distributing apple pies to children bit. Even I didn't do enough drugs in the nineties for that one!
Anonymous,
My goodness, there IS a resemblance!
I grew up with the same childhood icons and never found the first four to be creepy. Number 5 on this list, by contrast, left an indelible impression on me. I was just on the verge of hitting puberty when the tall girl on Schoolhouse Rock stomped the small boy seemingly off of the face of the Earth. I knew it was supposed to be a joke, but I didn't laugh.
It's remarkable that a Saturday morning cartoon on a major network would indulge in something so provocative. The original storyboards for this gag in "Unpack Your Adjectives" do not include the STOMP climax, and interestingly, the girl who grows taller wears enclosed shoes, not sandals. But in the version that aired, not only has the girl's footwear changed, but her feet are disproportionately large compared to the rest of her body, with the only color in the black & white scene being the girl's red sandals.
I did not laugh at this scene: I was too enthralled! I have not been the same person since the tall girl stomped the small boy. For those of us watching on that Saturday morning in 1975, (predominantly male Schoolhouse Rock pupils,) it was the greatest day of our lives.
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